Trust me, people, this is huge. My friends are still in shock.
So for breakfast today, since I have a later class I have a bit more time, I decided to step *far* outside my European comfort zone and try oatmeal.
Some of you are probably surprised that I haven't tried oatmeal once in my twenty two years. Well, I asked my parents why we never had it growing up, and my dad replied "Probabaly because your grandparents can't even pronounce it."
*insert laughing smiley with tears rolling face here*
Well I made the oatmeal. Poured it into a bowl, added 2/3 cup of water and popped it in the microwave for 1:30.
It's not my intention to offend anyone with this blog, so if you're a bit sensitive, please skip the next five sentences... Oatmeal tastes like shit. I'm sorry for the language, but seriously wtf is this. Who decided this heated cardboard goopy mess was for human consumption??? And where is this person so I can physically assault him, which is what I feel this oatmeal did to me.
My little sisters response was *by far* my favourite of the week....
"Have you ever tried oatmeal?" -Me
"Yes. Have you ever tasted a**h***? They're very comparable." -Sister
LOL.
So after eating two spoonfuls of this 'food' that's somehow allowed on this cleanse (just looking at it feels like it would clog an artery... Or a New York City sewage system) I quickly mass texted my friends (here on referred to as my white friends, and asked 1.How they could willingly eat this, 2. Please tell me I did it wrong, 3. How do you make it better, 4. Yes I did that, it didn't work.
Apparently adding cinnamon isn't enough, but since this cleanse doesn't allow sugar, brown sugar and syrup were out of the question. A few of my friends said to add fruit (bananas, blueberries, strawberries) so I'll be doing that next time.
Anywhas, Day 2 Breakfast = fail.
Someone invent vegan-lactose-free-sugar-free-flourless pancakes. Please.
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